Learning how to win an argument can be a difficult task. Whether you’re arguing with a girlfriend, a co-worker, parent, boss, or friend the dynamic can change drastically.
So is there a safe way to win an argument? Yes! over txt, email or phone!
Remain Calm. Remaining calm is the most important aspect of winning an argument. Not only can letting your temper flair lead you to making mistakes or creating holes in your argument but it will likely upset whomever you’re speaking with.
Don’t make accusations. Don’t accuse your speaker of anything. Don’t say: “you don’t read enough”, “you don’t pay attention” or “You’re ignorant”. Just leave insults or judgments out of it.
Think before you speak. Don’t raise your voice and don’t say anything you’re not 100% sure of!
Ask questions. Keep your “opponent” on his/her feet! Ask questions about their statements and logic. Over and over. Even answer a question with a question if necessary. Always acknowledge their opinion but dig deeper. Don’t ask condescendingly- but with a true curiosity. The ultimate goal is to guide them to your way of thinking without them having to directly admit you’re right (or at least not till the end). Because no one likes to do that.
Give them a way out. Pride is always an issue. Give your opponent a way out. Compromise with something you’re willing to give up or try to avoid having them directly admit their faults. This will avoid the escalation of the argument and save you a lot of time.
Never say you’re sorry. It may sound silly but if you say you’re sorry in an argument you’re actually saying: : “”I’m wrong”. Unless you’re able to always say: “I’m sorry YOU feel that way”. I’d avoid saying you’re sorry all together. Saying you’re sorry is allowing your opponent to “take a stab at you” and in most cases they wont “take it and back off” but rather push the knife deeper. As the saying goes: “you give a man a hand and he will take your arm.”
I hope this helps you learn how to win an argument!